Saturday, June 30, 2012

Blood Of A Saiyan

After about a year of reflecting I have made a decision to let go. I have been running this website since I was pregnant with my son (He is almost 13!!) and it has brought me so much happiness. It started in 99 on a free service that sucked but was all I could do at the time. Then, I formally bought a dot-com and relaunched in 2003. SO much joy! It also brings me so much work. Work that I have not had time for in 2+ years (almost 3!). I was one of the first English Dragonball Z websites. I was the first female English webmaster for Dragonball Z. After so many years of sleepness nights to fix code (I was running this before there was all this fancy website software), keeping my content fresh and relevant so that I was (during my peak) hitting over a thousand unique hits a day (without paying for advertising! That was word of mouth.), and meeting with people all over the country who were fans of my site, I just have to let it go.

I feel a loss because it has been something I have worked so hard on and been so proud of for so long. I also feel this relief because I am constantly haunted by the fact that the site sits there unattended to. It breaks my heart to let it go but it breaks my heart to neglect it.

I still own the rights to the dot-com and don't plan to give it away. Perhaps in a few years when my life is less busy I will restart the site. Perhaps I will not.

DBZ is still in my heart. Bulma and Vegeta are still one of my fav love stories. Future Trunks is still one of the people I want to hug the most.

still searching for Dragonball #4,
DJ aka Bulma of

Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Character drop..

I made a decision recently regarding Keepers. One of my fav characters has to be sidelined. I love her, I love her story, I love every tragic thing about her.. but.. honestly she is taking up space. The story can 100% proceed without her (so far). Because of that I am going to stream her scenes and remove her (for now). This is totally subject to change if she ends up serving a real purpose. It breaks my heart to make it sound like she is useless, because I don't believe her to be.. but for now it is not her time. So, Kariya, I hope you will forgive me. Your time will come, I believe that.. but for now you need to leave the pages until you can return with a shining purpose.

Masters bound..

With the last semester of my Bachelors degree approaching I have been doing a lot of soul searching. What to Master in?

I considered furthering myself in Psychology (my Bachelors focus) but not to be a therapist. Honestly I could never do that job. I don't think I have the patience (compassion?) to listen to people whine incessantly about First World Problems. Don't misunderstand me, there are people who have genuine problems and I am so glad there are therapists to help them. If I DID continue my Psychology degree I would want to be a Life Coach. I feel like I already do that in so many ways at my present job.

I considered an MBA. I have an Associates in Business with a focus on Small Business. MBA's are hot in demand and expected to remain so. I would have to have Masters level Accounting and Masters level Economics. No thanks. I know, I know, I always tell people to face fear and conquer it.. but this is not just average fear, I know my capabilities and I barely got out of Economics and Accounting (1 and 2!) at the undergrad level - Grad level will slay me. So I find this a logical decision.

I love my job. With a passion. I have never in my life loved a job the way I love this one. I have a purpose. I make a difference (at least I think I do!) I am hands on with college students. I feel (Cue the corny music) like I found my calling. So what can I do with my educational future to support my current job? Well it just so happens that there are such things as Masters programs in Student Affairs (Student Services, depending on the college). A Masters degree that ties into my job?! It's perfect.

Will I be as marketable as I will be with an MBA? Nope. Will I be happier continuing this path of fulfilled happiness than I would be if I ventured off into another one of material paychecks? Yep.

I'm not trying to say I don't like a good paycheck. I like things. And I love conventions. So yes, please pay me! But I will absolutely get work in the Student Services field with this degree and the experience I already have. I really think I will be a happy person with this decision.

A load is off my shoulders now. I see the path before me. It isn't full of golden leaves and diamond sidewalks, but it is full of joy and fulfillment. I choose happiness. I hope you will choose your path of happy, (even if for you it's the material stuffs.. be happy!)

keep smiling,

P.S. If the universe chooses to reward me with happiness AND money I will certainly not complain! Just sayin.

Tuesday, June 5, 2012

How to meet and woo a nerd girl.

Here is something I shared with the world about 3 years ago. I DID NOT WRITE  ANYTHING EXCEPT WHAT IS IN BOLD. Can anyone tip me back to the source? I cannot find it in my notes. Again, I did not write this wonderful article! Though I must say I agree with a huge majority of it! 

I stumbled across this on the net.  I think all men (and women!) should take notice.  My personal favs are 4, 6, 10, 11 and for the love of all that is holy, numbers 7 and 9.  Seriously.. numbers 7 and 9.  

Wednesday, June 24, 2009
How to Meet and Woo a Nerdy Girl
Recently, I’ve noticed a lot of folks coming to The Park Bench after Googling “how do I meet a nerdy girl?” Hopefully, this is not the manifestation of some creepy new human trafficking trend but instead is the result of more people wanting to find and date the nerdy woman of their dreams. With that in mind, I offer the following tips:

Tip #1: Know where to look.

The number one thing to know about nerdy girls -- they're probably not going to be doing body shots at the local sports bar on a Friday night. If they're out partying, it's over a micro-brewed pale ale in the quiet corner of their local hole-in-the-wall watering hole. Other good places to spot nerdy women: libraries, bookstores, used bookstores, any other place with books you can think of, comic book stores, knitting stores, craft stores, sitting in the park...reading a book, the local cat fanciers convention, at a midnight showing of "Alien" or in their living rooms, watching "Firefly" again.

Tip #2: It helps to look like this guy: ((these are clearly dead links. I don't even recall who the guys were in the pic.))

On the other hand, it helps to look like this guy too:

You're pretty much good either way.

Tip #3: Read lots of books.

Here’s the brutal truth: the nerd girl of your dreams is a brainiac. She’s going to know a lot of stuff about a lot of stuff. You’re going to need to study up -- none of that sitting at the coffee shop with an unread copy of “The Waste Land” in your hand, trying to impress the shallow ladies. Your nerd girl will check to make sure that the spine on the book is cracked and cracked good. She likely also will ask you to compare “The Waste Land” to “The Love Song of J. Alfred Prufrock.” If you have to resort to Cliff's Notes, do it surreptitiously. It’s like getting a butt implant – the nerd girls will know you’re faking it.

Tip #4: Don’t slack off on your video game skills.

One of the prime perks of dating a nerdy woman is that she will not yell at you for playing video games rather than, say, going shoe shopping with her. In fact, she likely will sit down next to you and pick up a controller. Here’s the thing though: she’s probably good at whatever game you’re playing so you better be good at it too. Whether it’s Mario Kart or Tiger Woods Golf or the bloody carnage of Grand Theft Auto, she will show no mercy. Practice, practice, practice!

Tip #5: Listen to NPR. (debatable)

Nerd girls like to stay up to date on their current events…and they like to do it with the dulcet, sometimes somnolent tones of NPR broadcasters. Beware, though, of the onset of NPR depression which stems from listening to so much news and sad stories about flooding in Nova Scotia or the inequities facing migrant workers that you become convinced the world is doomed and there’s no use leaving your house in the morning. This will put a damper on your dating. However, this prevalent disease also will give you an out if you've had to slack off on your NPR duties – just say, “I had to take an NPR break. Sometimes it makes me sad.” This serves two purposes: it gets you off the hook AND it makes you look sensitive. Bonus!

Tip #6: Be interesting.

Whereas a lot of ladies want you to be rich, nerdy women just want you to be interesting. Do you have a comic book collection that spans decades and rests in a vault somewhere untouched by human hands? That’s kinda cool. Are you learning how to do animation so you can one day post the adventures of a hobo cat online? That’s kinda cool too. Maybe you build houses for the poor on weekends or spend an afternoon teaching creative writing to high school kids? Awesome and more awesome. It doesn't matter what you do, just do it well.

Tip #7: Know your pop culture references.

Know the complete works of the Nerd Holy Trinity: Joss Whedon, J.J. Abrams and Peter Jackson. Know that Nathan Fillion will always be on your girl’s “freebie” list. When she goes to church and thanks God that Robert Downey Jr. survived the 1980s so he could play Iron Man, say “Amen” right alongside her. And for the love of all that is sacred and holy, do not EVER get “Star Wars” and “Star Trek” confused: one has Wookiees, one has Shatner, it’s not that hard.

Tip #8: Compliment her by saying, “You remind me so much of Liz Lemon.”

This is truly the highest form of flattery for just about any nerdy woman. Liz Lemon is our patron saint. Her inability to wear high heels, keep food off her face or refrain from making penis jokes while holding a tower made of Legos in her hands makes us reflect fondly on our own quirks. We love her…and you should too.

Tip #9: Embrace her collectibles.

That is not a euphemism for something pervy. It’s just a fact. When you walk into her apartment for the first time and notice a glass cabinet filled with a miniature TARDIS, a sombrero-wearing Giles, a 17-inch Han Solo and a two-foot long replica of the Enterprise NCC-1701-D, do not say, “What the hell is all this stuff?” Instead say, “What the hell? Why don’t you have MORE of this stuff? And may I mail order something for you?”

Tip #10: Be willing to go to conventions.

It’s just a thing we do. Relax and embrace it…and know that nine times out of ten, you’ll catch a glimpse of some nubile young woman dressed as a Princess Leia slave girl. It’s what the universe does to reward patience of our significant others.

Tip #11: Know what to do in a zombie attack.

We've been practicing for this one for a long time. We don't want to have to leave you behind.

Well, that about covers it. Congratulations on taking your first steps on the road to nerd girl nirvana. Know that you have selected the finest kind of woman possible. Way to go, champ!